1. Saying "I love you" immediately before, during, or following sex doesn't count. 2. Real men drive stick shift. 3. I will leave if you lie. 4. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts). 5. I'm convinced I'm pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so. 6. I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear. 7. "Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look. 8. Most of the time when I fantasize, it's about you. 9. I'm terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her. 10. I get turned on simply seeing that I have an e-mail from you. 11. I expect you to call me. 12. Only rock stars are allowed to wear leather pants. 13. I'm scared of losing my independence. 14. I'm more forgiving of you than I really should be. 15. Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. Manolo Blahnik shoes also do the trick. 16. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I'm not. (See directly above.) 17. If I'm not having sex with you, I'm... a.) ...having a fat day. b.) ...not feeling "connected" to you. c.) ...blackmailing you to get something I want. 18. Shoes determine whether you're fashionable or not. 19. I own a Debbie Gibson CD, and I'm not afraid to use it. 20. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.

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True,true all true. Here's something I would like to say... When my wife asks me "Do these pants make my ass look fat?"... I wanna say... "No, it's your big fat ass that makes your ass look fat." Or, when she sees a hot chick on the television and she says..."Geez, I wish I had HER body." I wanna say... "Gee, I wish you did too." But, costs too much to get a divorce!

lmao fatboy

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Please don't PM me with fta related questions, ask them in open forums so others can benefit from them too.